Merritt Music Festerval

M-kay... last chance before a girlfriend is hitched... 3 of my notoriously riotous University roommates hogtied me into taking off work for the Merritt Mt. Music Fest. One has already dropped out, I know 3 acts on the whole bill, and I truly believe that I'll be the only darkie on the lot. Being in gov't I'm used to being surrounded by oblivious White people, but come on...you don't think this is gonna hurt me?
http://www.mountainfest.com/
(Fucking redneck web designers, is this in Publisher?)
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DAY ONE: We got tanked even before setting up the tent. They ran out of spots so we set up in a field, ate our bbq chicken and prepared to see Tim McGraw. We could barely hear him, I had to jump to see, and we got lost. I slept with one eye open as a biker's daughter propositioned me on behalf of her dad. How sweet.

DAY TWO: It rained. Heaps of heavy mud caked onto our shoes. The portakleens (veteran owned) had served their country rassling in operation desert shit storm and lost. We went to town and Paul Brandt played for the Merritt townies. On the bus back I had a beer with Travis and his tit exposing mom, June. They invited us to get a program and hang with them...then we saw Paul Brandt play for the volunteers, and then finally for the main concert. By the end of it, Liz had a potential wedding song picked out, I'd seen Paul Brandt thrice, and none of us got sexually assaulted. The end.