Child Terrorist

On June 24, Timberline High School student Josh Glazebrook sent an email to his principal telling him he was going to blow up the school. The kid not only used a detection scrambling software to get the cops to track the messages back to a computer in Italy, but he had the gigantic balls to set up a MySpace group about the bomb threats (It's already been taken down). But, according to a comment on this weird emo-kid's sci-fantasy MySpace page, Josh is 15-years-old and is being held on 7 bomb threats, 2 counts of identity theft and one felony. I've incorporated Josh's image into my comic today. Notice his blinged out razor phone, oversized shirt and how he is throwing up a gang sign - is that the Timberline Valley Assassins? Oh no wait, that would be the gang I'd start if I lived in Lacey Washington. I see Macaulay Culkin playing Josh Glazebrook in the television movie. All of this net-terrorism has me thinking. Schools in Washington State must be pretty good. When I was 15 I couldn't even figure out how to hide my cigarettes from my mom. Anyways, my basteeya is burning (cinnamon + chicken + filo + powdered sugar= AWESOME). I must go tend to it.

Clutchy Hopkins: Mystery Man

Someone tell Jerod Leto that posting emo drawings under an assumed name is not going to win back Lindsay Lohan.

The best way to get famous or reassert your fame is by placing a mysterious narrative up on MySpace. For example, Clutchy Hopkins, jazz/funk instrumentalist/deejay is a well-travelled eccentric who currently lives in a cave in the Mojave desert. The individuals who claim to know Clutchy have created a MySpace video. However, given the general hawtness of Clutchy's beats, one theory is that he is in fact DJ Shadow. Judging by his love of plaid, earth spiritualism and long hair, my theory is that he is actually Kurt Cobain reincarnated as an electronic musician. Right on Kurt. Right on.

Evelyn Lau

Yesterday I went to an open-mic poetry night where acclaimed poet Evelyn Lau read her most recent works. Lau's widely read Runaway: Diary of a Street Kid, is an autobiography chronicling her journey onto the street where she escaped her overbearing parents, took drugs and entered the sex trade. This book may have been the only thing that stopped Perplexa's own alpha-mom in her tracks.

The night went smoothly until another poet read a poem about a porn actress met via MySpace entitled, "Jade and the Dirty Sanchez Army." It reminded me of how comedian Paul Rodriguez stood idly while Michael Richards spewed racial slurs at an audience. Said Rodriguez, "I kept waiting for a punchline that could justify the words before it. It didn't come."

The bespectacled male poet was asked to leave the stage 2 min. into the poem. I'm afraid that Evelyn Lau now thinks that every geek is online to infantilize and degrade "bad" women.

*Revisions to clarify- Poem was read by male attendee NOT Evelyn Lau